October 14th, 2016
Dear Todd,
Teen Tude is emerging. In fact that may be his new super villain name. Thus far all I can be certain of is that Teen Tude has the secret ability to transform me into Monster Mama (also known as Raging Bitch in Canada) and I must dig deep into my own powers and turn the other cheek. Again. And Again. And Again. And Again.
The trouble with Teen Tude is that he is smart. And therefore....biting. His remarks are ones that upon delivery would've been met with slap circa 1984 parenting. But in 2016 are met with a slow, drawnout pronunciation of his name and an evil stare---a tactic that has been effective thus far, but has no guarantee that it will last much longer.
Our latest interaction with Teen Tude went like this:
MM: Tomorrow we are going to take Mimi to hip hop to watch your sister and you and your brother and Papa and Daddy will go to soccer. Hip-hop is at 11am, and you have to be at soccer at 11:30. We should all be at the game by half-time.
TT: Why can't Mimi come to watch my whole game?
MM: Because she wants to see your sister's activity too.
TT: Well hasn't she seen something else already?
MM: No. And they came to your climbing last night too.
TT: Yea, but you guys left. You missed it.
MM: We didn't miss the whole thing. We stayed and watched you climb freely, until the class started and then you guys disappeared. We couldn't see anything. And so we decided to take Mimi and Papa to a nearby local brewery for a little bit and then came back to watch the last 30 minutes of climbing thinking you would definitely be visible then. When we got there you guys were all stretching and conditioning---not climbing.
TT: Because we were climbing when you guys went to the brewery.
I wanted to elaborate and raise my voice pointing out that parents, let alone grandparents, never came to a "practice anything" when we were kids! They came to performances or games. But, practice was for dropping off!!! But instead, I said...
MM: Trust me. They were bummed they didn't see more, but we didn't miss it on purpose. And they will be at soccer tomorrow.
TT: Are you sure you guys don't want to leave to go get a beer instead?
(This is where the long drawn out pronunciation happened---paired with an evil stare of hurt and anger)
Just as I was about to unleash a bucket of rage, fueled by lack of appreciation, while my laser beam eyes burned a circle around him in our carpet---showing off my perfect aim, I was thankful for your calm interjection. (I've decided to call you "No BS Todd." You're like a banned "GMO." Things don't need to get large and out of control...send in the NBST).
NBST: If you are so concerned about how much time they are spending with you, why don't you put down those paddles that have been in your hand since they got here and spend some time with them. You're so worried about them seeing everything you do, but when they are right here in the kitchen, you're down on the Xbox. Seems kinda selfish.
I had never felt more like a sidekick in awe. I wanted to shout out, "Suck it!" But was torn between acting 13 or holding my evil stare---despite the fact that my eyes were starting to dry out.
Teen Tude seemed to be deactivated and turned and went downstairs to visit with your parents.
Reaching for the eyedrops, I gave you a little kiss. Who knew back in 2002 I was hanging with Teen Tude's Kryptonite. We need to start conditoning...but we may get through this after all. Of course...it's early...
Dear Todd,
Teen Tude is emerging. In fact that may be his new super villain name. Thus far all I can be certain of is that Teen Tude has the secret ability to transform me into Monster Mama (also known as Raging Bitch in Canada) and I must dig deep into my own powers and turn the other cheek. Again. And Again. And Again. And Again.
The trouble with Teen Tude is that he is smart. And therefore....biting. His remarks are ones that upon delivery would've been met with slap circa 1984 parenting. But in 2016 are met with a slow, drawnout pronunciation of his name and an evil stare---a tactic that has been effective thus far, but has no guarantee that it will last much longer.
Our latest interaction with Teen Tude went like this:
MM: Tomorrow we are going to take Mimi to hip hop to watch your sister and you and your brother and Papa and Daddy will go to soccer. Hip-hop is at 11am, and you have to be at soccer at 11:30. We should all be at the game by half-time.
TT: Why can't Mimi come to watch my whole game?
MM: Because she wants to see your sister's activity too.
TT: Well hasn't she seen something else already?
MM: No. And they came to your climbing last night too.
TT: Yea, but you guys left. You missed it.
MM: We didn't miss the whole thing. We stayed and watched you climb freely, until the class started and then you guys disappeared. We couldn't see anything. And so we decided to take Mimi and Papa to a nearby local brewery for a little bit and then came back to watch the last 30 minutes of climbing thinking you would definitely be visible then. When we got there you guys were all stretching and conditioning---not climbing.
TT: Because we were climbing when you guys went to the brewery.
I wanted to elaborate and raise my voice pointing out that parents, let alone grandparents, never came to a "practice anything" when we were kids! They came to performances or games. But, practice was for dropping off!!! But instead, I said...
MM: Trust me. They were bummed they didn't see more, but we didn't miss it on purpose. And they will be at soccer tomorrow.
TT: Are you sure you guys don't want to leave to go get a beer instead?
(This is where the long drawn out pronunciation happened---paired with an evil stare of hurt and anger)
Just as I was about to unleash a bucket of rage, fueled by lack of appreciation, while my laser beam eyes burned a circle around him in our carpet---showing off my perfect aim, I was thankful for your calm interjection. (I've decided to call you "No BS Todd." You're like a banned "GMO." Things don't need to get large and out of control...send in the NBST).
NBST: If you are so concerned about how much time they are spending with you, why don't you put down those paddles that have been in your hand since they got here and spend some time with them. You're so worried about them seeing everything you do, but when they are right here in the kitchen, you're down on the Xbox. Seems kinda selfish.
I had never felt more like a sidekick in awe. I wanted to shout out, "Suck it!" But was torn between acting 13 or holding my evil stare---despite the fact that my eyes were starting to dry out.
Teen Tude seemed to be deactivated and turned and went downstairs to visit with your parents.
Reaching for the eyedrops, I gave you a little kiss. Who knew back in 2002 I was hanging with Teen Tude's Kryptonite. We need to start conditoning...but we may get through this after all. Of course...it's early...
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